10. He’s already secured the early endorsements of Hugo Chavez, Jimmy Carter, and Kathy Griffin.
9. Millions of your hard-earned stimulus dollars will be efficiently “recycled” back into his campaign by green energy companies.
8. He’s on a WTF mission.
7. His campaign slogan, “Sure you’re still unemployed, but we’re gonna shake someone down until they hire you” is a proven winner.
6. The unemployed have a lot more time and facility to commit Democrat vote fraud.
5. Because every squish Republican and Jeb2016 flak says so.
4. David Axelrod has an ironclad deal with the devil.
3. As it turns out, Obama was right: the Tea Party was really just mad at Bush and accidentally fired one-fourth of the Democrat caucus.
2. TOTUS will be loaded with updated lies.
1. Because the threat of losing the Republic makes Palinistas work that much harder, and victory that much sweeter.