You see, we’re “lowering medical expenses and premiums for all” by…raising them for pretty much everyone. This is such a sweet deal.
But don’t worry. It’s temporary. The fee starts at $63 in 2014 and it gets lower every year until it’s phased out in 2017 because, obviously, people with pre-existing conditions will stop costing more money after that. Right, and “The Bachelor” never used the Fantasy Suite for anything more than a soda pop and a game of Scattergories with all those other women before he proposed to you, girl. You know he loves you!