Like a lot of people, I’ve been giggling/eye rolling at the marketing onslaught being directed at America’s youth like a squadron of flying monkeys spilling out of the Wicked Witch’s castle. THIS latest bombing run however, had me diving for a gas mask due to the amount of desperation wafting through the land:
Vote for your favorite reason (and GIF) to get covered
Next on deck: Tweet out all the fun ways you can pay your income taxes!
Essentially, the White House typed out 16 sentences of "duh" that wouldn’t impress Captain Obvious and added cat gifs to them. Conspicuously absent: any mention of "premiums" and "deductibles."
1) Nobody’s invincible
We need that sweet, sweet invincible blood to make this vampire fly.
2) It’s the smart thing to do
3) You never know when you’ll take a hard foul
or when the Administration changes the rules on you.
4) Health care should be a right, not a privilege
5) You might qualify for free or low-cost coverage
Well hello, Ms. Premium. Have you met Mr. Deductible?
6) You only live once
7) Checkups could save your life
8) Injuries can lead to huge medical bills
9) It will give your mom peace of mind
10) Insurance companies are accountable to you
HAHAHAHAHAHA *breathes* HAHAHAHAHA
11) No lifetime limits on coverage
"Thanks to the Affordable Care Act, you’ll never worry about losing your coverage when you need it most."
12) Insurance companies can’t discriminate
You’ll just be out of network. But that’s okay, 3 hour road trip!
13) Birth control is free
14) Because accidents happen
"Just one accident could mean huge medical bills that you can’t afford."
Wait, my deductible is how much?!
15) Being uninsured is scary
People who had plans cancelled last year: Yeah. We know.
16) It’s the Law. We think. Probably.